Elopement vs Wedding
If you’re on the fence about having a full blown “traditional” wedding, or want to have a private elopment, read this first.
The literal definition of an elopement is to run away secretly to get married, often without parental consent. That definition still exists, but it is not how most couples use the word today. When people talk about eloping now, they are usually describing something much simpler and more intentional. A smaller, more private wedding day. Fewer people. Fewer traditions. Less pressure. More space to just be together. Sometimes that means it is just the two of them and witnesses. Sometimes it means a very small circle of people they feel deeply connected to. In rare cases, parents are not involved at all. The requirement to ask permission from the parents is old fashioned anyway. It’s a nice gesture, but it’s 2026 - if you can vote, you can choose who you marry.
Portrait from the engagement session of Heidi and Erich at Long Beach, Pacific Rim National Park, (near Tofino, BC)
What couples are really choosing when they elope is privacy and exclusivity. The day becomes easier to protect. The guest list stays small by default. One of the biggest things elopements remove is obligation. No pressure to invite everyone. No pressure to explain decisions. By the time people find out, the couple is already married.
Cost plays a role too. In most weddings we photograph, the reception is the single largest expense. What is interesting, after years of photographing both, is that couples feel at peace with their decision. Big wedding or small. Once the day has passed, there is no alternate version to compare it to. The choice becomes the right one simply because it was theirs.
One of our most recent elopements was completely private. No family. No guests. Just the couple and us. They did not even have a ceremony for us to photograph. We booked a session on the day they got legally married. It was a Friday. No one knew. We photographed them downtown in Saskatoon, wandered the city slowly, unhurried. Afterward, they went for a private dinner and stayed at the Senator Hotel. It was quiet, romantic, and entirely their own.
Elopements can still include many of the things people associate with a traditional wedding. The dress, florals, officiant, meaningful location/venue, and photography video. What elopements tend to offer more than anything else is intimacy.
They can also be extremely minimal. City hall. A courthouse. No photos. No video. No dinner. Just the legal act and the commitment. It’s still just as meaningful.
Most of the couples that hire us for their elopement, want full day photography and videography coverage because they want the story of the day preserved. Others simply want a short portrait session to mark the moment. The only way to do this wrong is to plan a day that is not actually what you want. The secret to a great day, and great photography and videography, is making sure you enjoy it.
Everyone has different relationships with the people in their lives. Some families are deeply supportive. Others are complicated. Some dynamics carry weight and history. If inviting certain people would taint a day you want to savour, you do not owe anyone an explanation for protecting it.
Big weddings are not for everyone. Small, private days are not for everyone either.
If you find yourself using the words “have to” or “should” while planning, that is usually a sign to pause. If you stripped away budget conversations, trends, and social expectations, the real question is simple:
Do we want to bring all of our loved ones together to celebrate, or do we want a day that is just for us?
Weddings are not about comparison. They are not about doing it differently than your friends or matching what you have seen online. A marriage is not measured by guest count.
Give yourself permission to make the day yours. Celebrate in the way that feels right. Big or small. Loud or quiet. Public or private.
And if you want it documented, we would love to help.